Intro
For anyone who follows me, you will know how much I absolutely love reading books. I started from a very young age and completed the Famous Five and Secret Seven by Enid Blyton collection. I think this is where I curated a very strong imagination and fascination for life. I took a break from reading from the ages of 12-21 when I returned to reading but this time to self help books. My first self help book I purchased was The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A Fck by Mark Manson and it changed my life. From here, I fell in love with all things mindset, wellness, psychology, mental health etc. I couldn’t read or listen to enough of it. I became obsessed. I wanted to learn as much as I could on why I think a certain way, why I care about what other people think of me, how I can change my life and change my mind and create a whole new relationship with the voice in my head. Books were always one of my favourite ways of learning. I thank the books I have read for all the knowledge I have today to share with you. I will share here the benefits of reading, why everyone should read self-help books and some of my top self-help books that I think everyone needs to read in their lifetime.
About reading
Undoubtedly, the finest way towards personal growth is to read books. Reading books benefits both your physical and mental health, and those benefits can last a lifetime. They begin in early childhood and continue through the senior years. Here’s a brief explanation of how reading books can change your brain — and your body — for the better. One sheds one’s sickness in books. It’s something anyone who loves reading will attest to: sometimes getting lost in the pages of a good book can be just the cure you need for a broken heart, a stressful day at work or frazzled nerves. For people who enjoy reading, it can be an excellent way to de-stress. Taking time out to enjoy a good book not only provides a healthy distraction from the stresses of daily life, it also offers a chance for your body to relax, helping ease muscular tension and frazzled nerves. Depending on the individual, they may prefer to become engrossed in a fictional story, one that captures the imagination and inspires creativity. For others, they may select a self-help type of book that offers step-by-step suggestions for managing mood and anxiety problems.
Benefits of reading
- Reading strengthens your brain
- Increases your ability to empathise
- Helps prevent age-related cognitive decline
- Reduces stress
- Prepares you for a good night’s rest
- Helps alleviate depression symptoms and improve mental wellbeing
Types of reading
A fictional cure: Reading great fiction can help us to feel we’re not alone and also mediate our experiences by giving us different models of human thinking and feeling. Bibliotherapy can promote increased self-awareness. Fiction really has the ability to capture someone’s imagination when you read it aloud to them, whether you are someone who normally enjoys reading or not. It’s a creative process when you’re listening to it and that opens up your imagination and your mind. The text is really a tool for allowing a glimpse into the self and that happens when the spotlight is on the text and the characters, not the person in the group. The discussion is about the characters, so when you read slowly there’s time to think about the characters and how it relates to them, so the self comes in in another way. In a good story the characters speak for us, because we recognise their emotion — sadness, joy, anger, frustration — and we feel it when the character gives us the right words to articulate or express that emotion. It relieves us when we find the exactness in a written word of what we are feeling and that we are unable to express ourselves.
Self-help reading – my personal fave!: ‘Self-help’, as the name suggests, is the action or process of bettering oneself or overcoming one’s problems (personal or emotional) without the aid of others. For many years now, self-help books have compiled a wide array of solutions to improving almost every human problem, including being more productive, achieving success, building stronger relationships, finding happiness, etc. Going by this, it seems important to have a self-help book on your bookshelf. What is a self-help book? Any text that gives you a guideline, advisory, tutorial, steps or an approach or method to help you achieve improvements or changes in your personal or professional life in some way small or big would be called a self-help book. There is evidence from numerous studies that self-help reading can benefit those suffering from mild to moderate depression and anxiety, by improving their mood and resilience to stress. Self-help reading can provide people with new insights into the way they are feeling and ways they can improve their state of mind. Self-help books may offer specific information about a particular disorder or detail strategies that can be learnt and applied by the reader to help overcome their current problems. It can also be helpful to read about another person’s experience with the disorder and how they have successfully coped with it. In this sense, reading can normalise a persons experience as well as offer reassurance. Books offering step-by-step guidance for overcoming a particular disorder are typically from a cognitive-behavioural perspective, which teaches strategies to manage negative thoughts. These sources of information can help the person modify negative patterns of thinking or unhelpful behaviours that may be maintaining their disorder. In the modern world, the impact of quality self-improvement/ Self-help books is unfathomable. Self-improvement books can act as life-saving drugs. These books would help us see things in a different perspective. The dark shades of life would suddenly appear grey and when probed further begin to reveal colours hidden in them. Mostly, the solutions of our problems lay hidden within us or in our surroundings. The self-improvement/ Self-help books point towards the right direction and help us find the solutions.
Who can benefit from self-help books?
Self-help books are more effective at helping us learn new life skills, like assertiveness, problem-solving and even tidiness. Nobody is perfect, and we all have areas where we’d like to improve. If you’re like most people, you’ve sometimes wished you could be more patient or more outgoing, more resilient or less concerned with what others think. Maybe you’re just looking for ways to be happier. These are the kind of skills where self-help books can be really useful.
Find the right self-help book for you
As with other self-improvement practices, like journaling for self-improvement, it starts by identifying your goals. An easy way to do this is to make a list, starting with the sentence, “I want to learn to be more/less/better at ___________.” Think of the different ways in your life you would like to improve.
How to make the most of reading self-help books
Now that you’ve found a self-help book you think you can benefit from, it’s time to dive in! Self-help books are a lot like relationships — you get back what you put in. Reading for self-improvement doesn’t have to be boring or tedious, but it’s something you should take seriously. There are a few general guidelines that will help you get the most of your self-help book.
Read the book thoroughly and with intention: Unless specifically instructed otherwise by the author, take the time to read through the book from start to finish. You never know what you may miss otherwise. Make sure that you’re in an environment that supports self-improvement. It can be indoors or outdoors, at home or in a library or cafe, but it should be someplace that’s relatively quiet, free of distraction, and allows you to read your self-help book with intention and purpose. Avoid things like reading at work, reading with the TV on, and reading when you’re pressed for time.
Be open to suggestions: You may not agree with everything that you read, but you’ve chosen this book for a reason. Try to keep in mind that your own ideas about a given topic may not include all the most recent research or may be colored by your own experiences. Try to stay open while you’re reading. If you find something strange or doubtful, just make a note of it to come back later. You may find that as the book progresses and you start putting things into practice, it ends up being true. In any event, don’t go in with a closed mind, or you may miss out on some life-changing advice.
Take notes, make plans and put them into action: Almost every self-help book out there will have actionable advice – things you can actually do that will make a difference in your life. I recommend taking notes from the book, making a plan of action based on the practical exercises you’re given, and then putting them into action. Almost every self-help book out there will agree – if you don’t put in the work, you won’t get the results.
Journal about your progress: As you start to integrate the book’s advice into your daily life, you’ll want to record the experience. Write down any thoughts or feelings you were having at the time (even if they’re ones of doubt or dismay), whether you were successful, and why or why not. The act of writing down these experiences will help you to understand them better, pick up on any patterns that could be areas of improvement (or achievements worth celebrating!).
Enjoy the journey: Self-improvement takes a long time. You may read several self-help books before getting significant benefits, taking insightful information, useful exercises and helpful tips from a number of them. Be patient and recognize that change takes time. To the best of your ability, try to enjoy the process. Celebrate your victories and focus on correcting negative behaviours without demonising them or yourself. Accept your shortcomings as normal and natural, and then focus on trying to enjoy the process of self-improvement. You may find great comfort in taking control of an aspect of your life that previously frustrated you. At the same time, be patient and understanding with yourself. The simple act of trying to get better is already a huge step in the right direction; allow yourself to feel proud of that step, and then continue making them.
Benefits of self help books
- You interpret yourself and the world more positively.
- You’re inspired to make better choices and take positive actions more often.
- You don’t improve; you expand.
- You smash through your limitations.
- You create personal projects that rocket your growth.
Even if you struggle at first, it’s worth it to read an inspiring book every morning or at whatever time works best for you. You can amplify your creativity, productivity, positive self-image, and capabilities. Starting is simple, and only takes the commitment to begin.
Reasons to read self-help books
The approach given is tried and tested on numerous people and by numerous readers.
The author is an expert. The text has been written by subject matter experts. So you get advice from the best of the best. The options available are so vast that you can read broad strategies or narrow down to one specific niche and read about it. And who said you should read them only if you have a problem. Read them to learn something new. Read them to grow your knowledge. Read them for the valuable information they give. Read them to inspire yourself to greater and better things. There is no limit on how many experts you consult. You may read one book and stick to it or read ten and decide to implement one of each. Self-help books change the way you think. They make your thinking more positive. Anything seems possible just with the right choices you make. Learn the art of getting comfortable in your own skin. Stop allowing your weaknesses to hold you back. Increase your self-belief. Increase your clarity and focus. Open your mind to new approaches. Challenge yourself. The information is laid out in a logical and clear manner
Main takeaways as to why you should read
- improves brain connectivity
- increases your vocabulary and comprehension
- empowers you to empathise with other people
- aids in sleep readiness
- reduces stress
- lowers blood pressure and heart rate
- fights depression symptoms
- prevents cognitive decline as you age
- contributes to a longer life
Main takeaways as to why you should read self help books
- Motivation
- You are inspired to make better choices and take positive actions
- Encouraging quotes
- Unleashing the inner possibilities and break your limitations
- A different interpretation
- Live outside of your comfort zone
- Developing interpersonal skills
- You look at yourself and the world more positively
- You create personal projects and grow
- New ideas and inspirations
- You don’t know everything
- Open your mind
- Build knowledge
- Its good for you.
My Recommended Books
The subtle art of not giving a f*ck by Mark Manson
Atomic Habits by James Clear
Lost Connections by Johann Hari
Ego is the enemy by ryan Holiday
Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert T. Kiyosaki
The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman
The Chimp Paradox by Prof Steve Peters
You are a Badass by Jen Sincero
Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins
The Happiness trap by Russ Harris
Surrounded by idiots by Thomas Erikson
The Power of now by Eckhart Tolle
The mastery of love by don Miguel Ruiz
Not a life coach by James Smith
The alchemist by Panlo Coelho
The untethered soul by Michael. A. Singer
Man’s search for meaning by Viktor E. Frankel
The seat of the soul by Gary Zukav
The power of your subconscious mind by Joseph Murphy
Think like a monk by Jay Shetty
A new earth by Eckhart Tolle